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It's the new Limbaugh defense: I'm a stud.
I'm dating the “24″
tech maven, look at me.
Jack Bauer would not be amused. Why? Because Jack
Bauer is a Democrat, Rush, not some ex drug addict, flaccid excuse for a
man who likes to travel to child prostitution capitals of the world for kicks.
Jack Bauer doesn't play golf. He rides dirt bikes.
I mean, come on, can you see rattled, fat, drug addled Rush blazing through
the wide open spaces, jumping hills on a motorcycle? He's too scared. He's too
soft.
Jack Bauer scales buildings. He doesn't sit on his fat back side sending others
to do it for him.
Republicans don't serve in the military, they let others do the time, while
begging for deferment after deferment. Can you imagine Jack Bauer getting out
of Vietnam because he had a boil on his butt?
Jack Bauer is embarrassed for Rush. Real men serve. Pussies don't.
Jack Bauer would go to war if drafted. He'd call Paul Hackett a hero. Jack
Murtha would be a friend and confidant.
Republicans swiftboat veterans.
Jack Bauer would slit your throat for doing it.
Jack Bauer wouldn't hang out with the elite and effete. He'd hang out with
blue collar men who do man's work.
Anti gay measures in Congress? Jack Bauer could care less about gays. He's
got real work to do.
Flag burning amendments? Jack would laugh in your face.
Parading around new gun measures? Jack Bauer dares anyone to take his guns
away. He's a Democrat so he's not stupid enough to think anyone can.
Telling a woman what she can do with her own body? Jack Bauer couldn't imagine that, because he thrives on strong women who are individuals. Jack Bauer wouldn't think of calling smart women with careers “feminzis.” That's for soft who are afraid of them. Jack Bauer isn't afraid of anything.
Jack Bauer doesn't support a president and vice president who lies and uses
the CIA. He doesn't support a president who was too soft to do his duty in the Guard. He calls them out and goes after them. He respects his buddies in the
CIA, not some glory hound desk jockey.
As for Bill falafel king O'Reilly coming to Limbaugh's aid, well, Jack Bauer
would get the joke, then spit.
On June 27, the conservative commentator ran a segment on his Fox News show
“The O’Reilly Factor” in which he stated that “powerful
people” were trying to “unjustly harm” Rush Limbaugh over
his recent Viagra confiscation.O’Reilly also claimed that having a prescription medication not prescribed
to you was not illegal, and called Limbaugh’s three hour detainment
at the airport “political persecution.” While he called it persecution
by the “big clubhouse” that is Palm Beach, he failed to acknowledge
that Limbaugh was held by US Customs.In other words, O’Reilly may have stood up to defend Limbaugh, but
he failed to change anyone’s opinion in either direction. Kudos to you,
Bill.
Oh, and one more thing, Jack Bauer wouldn't take a vacation to one of the child
sex capitals of the world. He'd take a cross-country road trip of America, go
to Las Vegas and gamble, see the Grand Canyon.
He also wouldn't have 3 wives. He's a loner or a one woman man, something Republicans
don't understand. Just ask Rudy, Newt or all the other serial adulterers in
the Republican Party.
Jack Bauer would be laughing at you, Rush, just like everybody else.
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