The latest klieg light Christians release a statement.

The latest klieg light Christians release a statement.
[photo via A&E]

THERE IS no matter of insult, bigotry or ignorance that fundamentalists won’t attempt to camouflage with their own tortured interpretation of “coarse,” because somewhere along the line in all that Bible immersion, humility and admitting you’re wrong flew right over their heads, which were firmly planted in the ground.

We want to thank all of you for your prayers and support. The family has spent much time in prayer since learning of A&E’s decision. We want you to know that first and foremost we are a family rooted in our faith in God and our belief that the Bible is His word. While some of Phil’s unfiltered comments to the reporter were coarse, his beliefs are grounded in the teachings of the Bible. Phil is a Godly man who follows what the Bible says are the greatest commandments: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart” and “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Phil would never incite or encourage hate. We are disappointed that Phil has been placed on hiatus for expressing his faith, which is his constitutionally protected right. We have had a successful working relationship with A&E but, as a family, we cannot imagine the show going forward without our patriarch at the helm. We are in discussions with A&E to see what that means for the future of Duck Dynasty. Again, thank you for your continued support of our family. [Robertson Family Official Statement]

As a spiritual person equal to anyone who professes to “love the Lord your God with all your heart,” this statement by the Duck Family Dynasty is offensive in its arrogance alone. Of course, for klieg light Christians, everything is about them and their exalted faith, which they wield as a weapon as if no one else is equal. It’s never about the wrongs done by offensive statements made in an interview where you’re taking a star turn, but, oh, golly, didn’t mean no harm. Instead, it’s to be believed every utterance of the guy who never bothered to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes not caked with hillbilly mud is golden.

It’s preposterous to hide behind the First Amendment, which doesn’t protect performers on a network, especially called A&E, enjoyed by people of all persuasions, including many normal gay and lesbian individuals. What the Duck Family Dynasty patriarch knows about African American struggles, it’s about as much as I do, but at least I don’t try to interpret their pain and call it wisdom.

Last time I looked no one went to jail. A&E is not saying Phil Robertson can’t express any opinion he wants. He just better edit himself as long as he’s associated with the network.

As a performer since I was younger than 10-years-old, I was always told, by every agent and manager I ever had, that my own personal grievances, opinions and scattered ramblings better be filtered when I’m under contract. That the Duck Family patriarch was either too ignorant or arrogant to bother to consider these facts is not surprising given the level of culture coming out of reality TV land.

I certainly didn’t call for Robertson to be fired, but I rarely if ever join the boycott bandwagons, either. Regardless of the fact that if I owned the network and he was under contract to me that’s exactly what I would have done. No one with such reprehensible impulse control, making comments that would not be tolerated on camera in the show I hired him to do, is worth supporting when he only coarsens the cultural dialogue and adds nothing of value in return.

Gov. Bobby Jindal wanted to make sure his constituents knew he had their backs, so he can stay governor. But comparing the Duck Family Dynasty, who is under contract with A&E, to Miley Cyrus, who is a free agent artist beholden to no one, is once again adding ignorance after insults.

Hey, but maybe the latest klieg light Christians to find stardom on cable will get lucky and capitalism and the market will save them and the show will go on.

Even Sarah Palin found a new home and tonight talking to Sean Hannity she invited the Duck Family Dynasty to come over to the Sportsmans channel. Seems a more fitting place than A&E, and with $80 million and counting, it’s not like they need more money.

Wonder if they’re tithing”¦